Image by Avelino Calvar Martinez from Pixabay
by Heather Lang
Get comfortable making mistakes and owning them.
Those feelings of insignificance might just be the things that make you a better person.
Navigating the complexities of life often involves grappling with feelings of insignificance and the fear of making mistakes. Many people, myself included, struggle with the idea of being left out or not fitting into the mold that society or specific industries expect.
For years, I was too afraid to share my story or ask questions for fear that I would just be rejected by the industry that I longed to be a part of for the better part of my life. I like to tell people that I am an introvert trained to be an extrovert. I am not good at making small talk and carrying on conversations just for the sake of filling time. I like to do things with purpose. For almost two decades I have been “trained” by organizations and people who believed in me on how to be an extrovert. Those people took the time and made it their mission to make me see what they saw in me. Even then, I still fight inner demons that make me feel insignificant, invisible, and even unrelatable. However, I have learned that the journey toward self-improvement is paved with challenges that ultimately shape us into more compassionate individuals. “Be the person you want your children to be.”
“If you aren’t making mistakes, you aren’t trying.” This quote resonates deeply with me because my life is a testament to its truth. Mistakes have become so frequent that I’ve stopped counting them, but each one has taught me an invaluable lesson. I’ve learned that personal growth is a never-ending process, and acknowledging areas where I can improve is crucial. It’s vital to understand that if someone dislikes me for who I am, that reflects more on them than on me. My loud personality may embarrass some, but it’s a sign of my trust and comfort with those around me. Honesty and authenticity are cornerstones of my character, and I believe that if someone isn’t ready for an honest answer, they probably shouldn’t ask for my opinion.
Public speaking remains a daunting task for me. My heart races, I have a hard time breathing, and my face gets beat red. Self-doubt sets in, and I literally have to encourage myself and build myself up while asking God to wrap his arms around me to provide me with comfort. After the speaking engagement is done, I feel relief, pride, and readiness to keep going. I just need to work through the initial self-doubt.
You are making an impact without even realizing it.
There have been many instances when I am attending farmers markets, vendor shows, pig sales or just out in public and someone recognizes me, not because we are good friends or have known each other for a long time, but because they “follow me” through my social media posts and blogs. They strike up a conversation and make it known that they really enjoy following me because they relate to me or learn new things.
Ultimately, I strive to be the best version of myself, not a version that conforms to others’ expectations to make them comfortable. Life is full of choices, and I choose not to let feelings of insignificance hold me back. Instead of hiding or pretending to be busy to avoid interaction, I embrace my mistakes and learn from them. These experiences don’t hinder my growth; they fuel it. By accepting my flaws and standing by my true self, I hope to teach my children to live authentically and courageously, free from the constraints of others’ expectations.
To follow our story and journey, I invite you to follow us on Instagram @ndpiggytales.
Heather is the former NDFB District 7 Promotion and Education Committee member and is also a former American Farm Bureau Federation P&E member. She currently serves as the president of Burleigh County Farm Bureau. Heather and her husband, Lucas, raise animals and crops on a 5th generation farm near Bismarck.