Image by Joshua Miranda from Pixabay
by Kelli Bowen
I have transitioned back to work at the office, but am still working some hours at home. During this time of transition, I have realized my working-from-home struggles seem a bit more colorful than my office struggles. Read on…
For a change of scenery, I sometimes work in my kitchen instead of from my bedroom closet. The other day I was walking from the kitchen to the bedroom with my laptop, I had a video call coming in so I tried answering it while I walked to my bedroom, but another coworker happened to be instant-messaging me at the same time. This seemed to be causing a communication-triangle-of-doom glitch that wouldn’t allow me to answer the video call. Then my toe found the blunt end of an immovable object and I lost my balance and fell, toe throbbing, I saved the laptop with some less-than-graceful acrobatics. “Mother @——!!!” I let out one of the big-bad swears while I landed on my elbow-knee-face. I regained my balance and my composure and looked down at my computer screen. It turns out I had actually answered the call, and my coworker’s face was inquisitively looking at me. “Hi… Umm…. How’s it going?”
Tiring of Playdoh, Miss A and Miss E asked if they could go out onto the front stoop. Sure. I was in my office/closet with no view of that side of the house. After a few minutes Miss A let out a blood-curdling scream. I jumped up and in the 17 seconds it took me to run from my desk to the door, 879 scenarios ran through my head: profuse bleeding, is she severed? Why am I not watching her more closely? Is social services on the way? They had to have heard. Is she being abducted? Did aliens land and she’s being beamed up?!? What horrific debilitating experience is my youngest being subjected to???? I hit the door and saw Miss A pointing and simply said: “June beetle.”
I’m on a video call with the company’s CFO trying to find the root of a discrepancy. Miss A walks in.
“I want a ‘nack.” She’s left me alone for almost an hour, NOW she needs a snack.
I mute the line: “Mommy’s on the phone right now, I’ll make you lunch when I take my break in 20 minutes.” I’m doing the thing where I’m trying to talk without moving my lips so my coworker doesn’t realize I’m arguing with a 4-year-old. Miss A takes a step closer:
“I want a ‘nack…” Oh crap. She knows I’m cornered. I side-eye her, and with the no-lip-moving sternness, I keep the line muted “Give me 10 minutes and I’ll take a break.” Evil pre-K eye-glimmer. I just leave mute on, I know she’s about to blow.
“I want a ‘nack!!!!” She wanders off satisfied with herself…probably to find a snack. “Love you Mama!”
I have no idea what the CFO said but I think we found the problem, pretty sure I am not getting fired, but I can’t be sure, I have no idea what was said. I’ll clean my desk the next time I’m at the office-office just in case.
If you’re struggling with your work dynamic, take heart: there are lots of us struggling, and at least we don’t have the Corona-19-Murder Hornet-Covid-Apocalypse-riot-virus…yet.
Kelli makes her home in rural Cass County with her husband, two daughters (8 and 4), three dogs, and random poultry. She works for a regional seed company by day and tries to be an alright mom, wife, friend and writer by night.